I realise I have always been overly focused on my inner stream of thoughts and feelings.
It is only recently that I resigned to fate and wanted to make the best out of this habit. That’s especially so after the added understanding of how introverts function. So for example, I tried “adding value” to the habit by not only paying attention to inner voice, but also reflecting on them, and understanding the reasons behind them. That way, it allowed me to understand why I think in a certain pattern, and why I feel certain emotions to particular situations. Kinda reminded me of the “meta-cognition” and “double-loop learning” mechanism that my Professor mentioned in seminars.
Through this increased awareness and reinforcing through little reflections here and there everyday, I started seeing benefits, eg. being able to identify similar situations quicker and handling them better each time.
The down side is: I don’t know if it’s a good thing to be stuck with this habit. It’s so hard to control it sometimes. I can just switch off unconsciously and walk around in a daze on the streets. Sometimes I don’t even know where exactly I’m walking or don’t remember what others said. This happens most and easiest when the “external stimulation” is wayyyy toooooo overwhelming, like walking in crowds, or when too many conversations are happening at a go. I would just automatically shut off from everything and be in my own world in my head.
Guess I need to learn how to stay focused on the surroundings more from now on.
